Waiting For Azure - sky..

x’mas has just passed for 2 hours..and my celebration for it..for this year was 48hours..haha…can’t help it..my b’day too ma…

firstly..on the x’mas eve…kicked off the day with a lazy morning ..just sat on the couch..doing nothing….helding the remote control of the tv…"playing" changing channels….than..went for dinner..an early b’day celebration with my family…since every year we celebrate on 25th..so this year..i was feeling a bit WEIRD..haha…we were having the dinner in a room..and outside the room…..a wedding dinner started at the same time…so while they were "yam - sing -ing" outside…we were singing b’day song…hehe….this year…i gt a really special gift from my 2 adorable cousin sister…hehe…they have made me a bottle of stars…really like it…and they have locked the bottle with a "kids’ lock" where the password is sticked under the lock..haha…so much of stealing it….but since i really love stars..so..i truly appreciate it….

after dinner…went to klcc for "national treasure 2" with my parents n bro…since i have high expectation on it…it truly dissapoints me….plus…i was busy replying those sms…wishes….since 12am..so..i didnt really pay attention to the movie..hehe..(anyways..thanks everyone..for all the wishes..i hope i have replied all the sms..haha)

on the x’mas day…dennis came to my house…..he is still the same..thin…(according to my mum)..so.. my mum was there sitting and chatting with dennis…while i watched tv and day dreaming..hehe…my pal..a "si lai sat sau" hehe..than..we went to pavillion..after walking up and down..left and right..finally dennis decided to eat at Zen…(but still it was not that nice..haha)..and we waited for san ru n stuart..they were stucked..in the traffic…for almost 2 hours…finally when they were here..we went to the curve instead…after all the jam…;)

before curve..stopped by at stuart’s house a while…..since we have not been to his new house…it was really neat..hehe..surprise surprise!!!!hang out in his room..talking nonsence…about "drain" and "tunnel" ;)and called ed in Aust…ended up talking to everyone…over there..sharlyn…kin yen…and eric…whinning at them..asking for prezzies..hehe…

than..we headed off to "Apartment" in Curve..for dinner….after standing and waiting..and walking around the restaurant..at last sat on the bar…..finally we got a table….promised by the waitress..we will have a free cupcake…which i sweared..she said…each one of us get 1…haha..ended up..we get a tiny one cupcake…which tasted like..? i am not sure..coz..i didn’t eat it..hehe…the food was ok..environment was good..wine was good…after a few sips…dennis started to talk nonsence..haha..and me..dizzy…(old liao)

than..we ended the night…hanging out…talking n having the nicest ice lemon tea i have ever tasted and mixed fruit waffel..which 2 of my beloved friends says..is not nice ..too bad..hehe..

oh..ya..the nicest prt..i got a really special prezzie..from my special friends..whom have six sence..(knew what i have wanted)so…in 2007..i have ended up my x’mas celebration..with full of love and care from everyone i have known..in my entire life

The results have finally been released….i should be jumping with joy coz finally i have gone through the hardest period of my life..but no…these few days i have been thinking a lot…

i still remember the day i found out that i have flunk the chemistry paper..i still cant believe that was my results ..coz after all during SPM..chemistry was one of my strongest subject..That moment..i felt like i was being hit by a something really heavy and hard..and couldn’t get up anymore…cry till there were no more tears..making everyone around me worry….truth to words….i kept on going like this for almost a year..even though i didn’t cry out anymore…my confidence level never gain up..and i have lost the will to stand up and continue with my life…During that period..besides my parents..of course there are many friends who are there for me…with their unconditional support and help…truly..without them..i wont be able to get through these…

Around 2 more months to go…..and i will be starting the new chapter of my life in perth…instead of feeling happy..anxious..jumping up and down…i feel strange day by than..each morning…when i woke up..is like i am glad..i am still in my room..hehe…lame rite? the lack of excitement might be due to the fact that i knew life won’t be a bed of roses over there…..the fact that i will be facing more problems..more obstacles…no more kind hearted lecturers with tips..no more readily cooked meals ….no more "just me and books time" no more without worrying about finances…….makes me wonder about my ability..yaya…many people told me that i worry too much….when the time comes..i will know how to act and what to do…but will I?

i have seen the people around me changing..once there start living away from home..away from the people close to them…some changes are good …some changes..to me…is not necessary..and sometimes affecting the relationship with other people around them…maybe the time..maybe the surrounding..or maybe all the problems have change them..i am not sure..but to me..i just wish to stay like who am i today..ya..pretty inmature thoughts…coz..everyone needs to grow up…learn more in their life to be stronger and more mature..but i am not..silly to say this..but i just want to stay in my own "happy and naive life"….this might due to my old wounds..which are still in healing process..makes me think that….i do not want to hope much..i do not want to ask much…i just want to be glad and happy and satisfy with what i have right now…

so… what’s the next step? well..lets just hope..everything will be fine…