Waiting For Azure - sky..

A lot of things have been happening lately…. First thing first..i have just came back from my margaret river trip…it was really a blast..considering the fact that I am spending some time to have fun in such a beautiful place with my classmates..without talking anything about studies………….. It was really an eye opening experience…….places that all the while i thought i can just view it through pictures and postcard were actually in front of my eyes…and..i really love the place that we have stayed for 2 night over there…it was a great house…and how i miss the couch and the TV……really wish to carry the couch all the way back in my room..even though there’s no space for it..hehe…

and now..here am i back here..snap back to reality…need to start studying for next wednesday’s exam…..have been telling myself to work hard lately..not been working hard enough….still slaking around…

lots of things in my mind lately…between studies…just few days ago..i just knew that I got the pharmacy job that i have went for interview for last few weeks…I am not sure is a good news or not..when i first knew it..all i can think of it…will i able to cope with it? how am i going to break the news to my classmates? this and that….yeah..i have been thinking and planning how to break the news..since there’s few of us who went for the same interview…coz..to me..i felt that among all of us…the job shouldn’t have been mind..coz in terms of experience and academic wise…i am not really that good…..plus..i am really worry sick that the pharmacist have a high expectation on me which in the end..i won’t be able to give the what she has expected…

Maybe i am thinking too much? trying to read people’s mind too much? I am not sure…maybe I am the complex one here…

All I can do right now is just to try to allocate my time well….try my very best…..and do what i think is right….

It’s 3.15pm…the clock is ticking quicker and quicker each day..i have so many things to do..but here am i staring at the window…not sure is it because of PMS or what..recently..i can’t seem to focus and always feels annoyed over small little stuff and get frustrated easily..sigh…i really miss home..till the point i even call back..just to listen to my mum’s voice..seems like just yesterday..i have boarded the plane back to KL..for holidays..and here am I again….in perth..back here..stuck in my room…with the end of first week…lecture notes to catch up on and project to finish….yeah….just the first week..but seems like i have tonnes of things to do..

I have never miss home so much before..thinking of that…missing all the food…the time which all i did is kick back and relax…going out..shopping…spending time with my family and friends back in malaysia…….and YES..i am counting the days till my next holiday..i think i really need to get bac my study mood and stay focus…for NOW..

nothing much has changed here in perth..in terms of environment…..is still winter here..and i am really looking forward to spring…i am beggining to fill really dull with the weather..as for people…nothing has changed as well….the fact of my "couldn’t - care - less" attitude,does not help either… i have promise myself to loosen up a bit and start handling stuff in a smarter way…seems like at this matter of fact…i can’t seem to do so…last few days..a wise person told me to have a spacious mind and have a heart and mind as vast as space so that i can receive good teachings…when i heard of these..it really hits me hard..coz..since i am in perth..this is the only thing that i can’t seem to find a way to do so……maybe my mind and heart….does only have limited space…or..i have not expand it since long time ago..and now..it got "stuck" and can’t expand anymore….and the list of stupid reasons go on and on..hopefully…with an advice from someone wise..i will be able to grasp it..and do better…